Maybe Eternity

A Poem By Erin // 9/1/2013

1. Eternity
If I’m to live forever
I should pray that you will, too
Because, dear God, I wouldn’t want to live
Without, my darling, you

2. It Was a Bad Day
Maybe all these big girl dreams aren’t for me after all
Maybe I wasn’t born to go to college and get married
Maybe I wasn’t made for the usual course
Maybe I was born with wild eyes
Maybe I was born for the road.

3. The Pain of an Artist
Do I even really love you anymore
Or is it all for the drama
Self inflicted torment so I can feel inspired
At least enough to write a stupid poem

4. Guilt
I’m sitting here feeling sorry for myself
While someone else’s world is crashing apart
What a waste I can be sometimes
How selfish
And yet I still pity me

5. I Don’t Even Know
Sometimes I wonder why I love you
You can drive me absolutely insane
You’re so angry sometimes
Your stress gets to everybody
But then you’ll crack a joke
Send a smile in my direction
My stomach refills with butterflies
And I am reminded as to why I’m so stuck on you

6. You Me
I had this dream where you were here
Swigging a bottle of beer like it was the most natural thing in the world
Sitting on my porch swing, arm around my shoulders
We weren’t touching but there was a quiet closeness
I can’t tell you how right it felt just to have you next to me
When I woke up I thought it was real just for a fraction of a second
Then it hit me
Ran me through like a sword
Oh well
I’m used to it

7. When Everything was Better
I wish I was 8 years old again
Everything was so much simpler
My biggest worry in the world
Was if Daddy would get ice cream tonight
Not whether or not I had a future.

8. Obsessed
time is measured
in twenty minute spurts
isn’t it sad
that this is how my nights are spent
not out with my friends like a normal teenager
just watching how i met your mother
extreme marathon style
but hey, what can i say
it’s addictive

9. Conflicted
i say that i don’t like
being angry
but it seems like
a trend as of late
i need a new light
in my life

10. Totally Not Crazy
I’m persistent
You can’t deter me
Which I know sounds stalker-ish
But I like you, okay

11. Stupid Girl
Why do I keep torturing myself
With these wild misconceptions
I say that I’m in love with you
But I don’t even know you outside
Of this damned place

12. Darling
I think that I
Love
Every letter in your name

13. Not Easily Broken
it would be nice to be made of steel
not easy to dent, not easy to bruise
i could shine and i could be pretty
if someone took the time to
buff out the scars

14. Stuck Between a Rock and a Hard Place
He likes me
That part is obvious
He’s sweet
If he asked, I’d like to say yes
I guess I’m just scared
We would go on a date
I would have fun
But would I still be thinking of you?
I don’t want to hurt anyone
That’s not my intention
But it seems like it’s happening
Whether I say yes or no.

15. A Lovely Sort of Love
She stretches her neck upwards and boldly presses her lips against yours. It doesn’t look gross, like you’re slobbering on each other. It’s sweet, like she’s professing something to you. She pulls away with a smile in her eyes and laces her fingers in yours. You squeeze her hand gently with a wide, glowing smile, your eyes crinkling up like they do when you’re really happy. I wonder what it would be like to kiss someone like that, to profess my love in the gentlest of ways.

16. Patience
I’ll
Just
Wait
A few more minutes
At least until I can
See
Your
Face

Comments

The Poetry Bug has struck again!!

These weren't as good as some of your other ones, but I still enjoyed them. :)

2. It Was a Bad Day: Good.
5. I Don’t Even Know: "My stomach refills with butterflies" I really liked that. Good imagery.
7. When Everything was Better: Perfect! It had this subtle ring to it. And oh my gosh...how important was the icecream when we were 8?! Now it's like "I don't want it. Got other things to worry about." Oh dear.
8. Obsessed: "but hey, what can i say
it’s addictive" good line.
10. Totally Not Crazy: Short and snappy. "But I like you, okay" I get the just-get-over-it feel.
11. Stupid Girl: 'misconceptions' is a great word. Good usage. :)
13. Not Easily Broken: It would be nice, wouldn't it? But alas.
14. Stuck Between a Rock and a Hard Place: It's like confused musings.
15. A Lovely Sort of Love: The rhythm's good.
16. Patience: Rhythm's good here too.

Looking back, I hardly critiqued, but I'll take the digital cookie anyway. :D

Maddi | Tue, 09/03/2013

Goodbye? Oh no, please. Can’t we just go back to page one and start all over again?” – Winnie The Pooh

Lol, you totally get the

Lol, you totally get the digital cookie. Thanks!

Erin | Tue, 09/03/2013

"You were not meant to fit into a shallow box built by someone else." -J. Raymond

Aw!

Aw! I love "A Lovely Sort of Love" it reminds me of my parents, which is so sweet!
Loved these... I see an inward journey, slowly but surely making it's way to success. If you were to see a plot line for you and your poetry, you would see that right now you're still in the rising action, not yet hitting your crisis. KEEP GOING! YOU CAN MAKE YOUR WAY TO THE END!
Love this poetry so much! Please keep posting!

Kassady | Wed, 09/04/2013

"Here's looking at you, Kid"
---
Write On!

Awww, thank you so much :). I

Awww, thank you so much :). I love that you can see a plot line! That was an accident :P. A big digital cookie for you!

Erin | Wed, 09/04/2013

"You were not meant to fit into a shallow box built by someone else." -J. Raymond

There were definitely some

There were definitely some good lines in here....

1. Eternity
I liked this. How short it was, and simple, and sweet.

2. It Was a Bad Day
Haha. We must be having similar thoughts. (I posted "Squirm"--I think in installment no. 5--which was similar). But yeah, as you already know, I so get these feelings.

3. The Pain of an Artist
I really, really like this. Really. I so get this.

4. Guilt
Related to this less...because I guess if I'm feeling self pitying I often don't think of people who have it worse. ;P Awful, I know. LOL

5. I Don't Even Know
Again, this reminds me of stuff I'm writing as of late. Sounds like we're having a lot of the same thought processes. I liked "absolutely insane" in this. It seemed to fit so perfectly.

6. You Me
I REALLY like the title. And I REALLY like the ending. Like, REALLY REALLY REALLY.

7. When Everything is Better
I guess I feel like this didn't delve quite deep enough to make an impact. Maybe it's the use of the word 'daddy'. I think here, coming from the POV of a girl who's older, reminiscing, 'Dad' would work better and almost be more...final, in a way. Now that she's not 'eight' anymore.

8. Obsessed
Oh, I know exactly what you mean. But hey--The Walking Dead and Downton marathons are SO MUCH MORE FUN.

9. Conflicted
Like it.

10. Totally Not Crazy
Perhaps my favorite. Especially those last two lines! LOVE! \

11. Stupid Girl
Like it. Can relate. (As you know from reading my Alarming amounts of poetry...;)

12. Darling
Again, reminds me of stuff like aych. Sorry! I keep comparing you to me, which I'm not trying to do. It really just seems like we have a lot of the same thoughts right about now. Obsessions will do that. Hahaha

13. Not Easily Broken
Loved every single line of this except that last one. It just seemed off. I actually think it would have been more powerful if it ended after "i could shine and i could be pretty'.

14. Stuck Between a Rock and a Hard Place
Like. Definitely get.

15. A Lovely Sort of Love
Like it. "profess" seems a little redundant.

16. Like it.

Keep posting! Sorry for the long novel length comment.

Madeline | Wed, 09/04/2013

everything was better when/you would call and I'd be like/yeah babe, no way

Thanks so much! Yeah, we

Thanks so much! Yeah, we definitely seem to think in a similar way!!!! Yeah, for 15 I kept on trying to find another word besides profess, but they all sounded funny -_-. Thanks for commenting!!!

Erin | Wed, 09/04/2013

"You were not meant to fit into a shallow box built by someone else." -J. Raymond

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