Elegant Shadow

A Poem By Hannah W. // 9/28/2009

Dance with me, elegant shadow!
take my warm fingers into your cool palm,
dance with me, dance with me, shadow!
across the moonlit lawn

Dance with me, bright-eyed shadow,
and spin me through the pale light
of the clock-face and star-falls
of the first autumn night

Dance with me, fleet-footed shadow!
Let the music be our guide,
let the notes of the bat-calls keep ringing
as they flit beneath the sky

Star-strewn, it glitters
blackened, and bright
like a candle in the cold breeze that shivers
so do we know there isn't much time

Dance with me, elegant shadow!
twirl with me near the top stair,
and when we must part, at the song of the sparrow
but whisper and I will be there

Dance with me, elegant shadow,
you are but a vison, a dreaming, and fleet
Dance with me, bright-eyed shadow,
under the sky in the autumn air sweet...

Star-strewn, it glitters,
blackened, and bright
Like a candle that near the window will quiver,
so I wait until the morning light.

Elegant shadow,
never forget,
Elegant shadow,
that place where we met
and elegant shadow!...

the sparrow will sing
his sparrow song
I have been here
all along.
 

Comments

Beautiful!!

This was lovely, Hannah! It reminded me of Peter Pan. I really loved it!!!!

Elizabeth | Mon, 09/28/2009

************

The Holy Spirit is the quiet guest of our soul." -St. Augustine

I really like the air of

I really like the air of mystery your poems seem to command a lot of times. This poem especially was beautiful and mysterious--yes, a bit like Peter Pan as Elizabeth said. I love your sense of rhyming and meter, it seems so natural!!

This was my favorite stanza: "Dance with me, elegant shadow/you are but a vison, a dreaming, and fleet/Dance with me, bright-eyed shadow/under the sky in the autumn air sweet"

Heather | Tue, 09/29/2009

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
And now our hearts will beat in time/You say I am yours and you are mine...
Michelle Tumes, "There Goes My Love"

 Gorgeous!  Honestly, I

 Gorgeous!  Honestly, I absolutely loved this!  Autumn is my favorite time of the year, and you captured it beautifully - something I have never quite been able to do.  You brought out the mystique, the romance, and I love the fact that you mentioned bats.  I love to sit and watch bats flit through the evening.

Very, very, VERY well done!

Mary | Tue, 09/29/2009

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Brother: Your character should drive a motorcycle.
Me: He can't. He's in the wilderness.
Brother: Then make it a four-wheel-drive motorcycle!

!!!!!!!

absolutely gorgeuos! sush a beautfil way of describing autom, simply wonderful....

Bernadette | Tue, 09/29/2009

Well, now it reminds me of

Well, now it reminds me of Peter Pan too! ;-D

Great poem!

Sarah B. | Tue, 09/29/2009

I love this. It's, in a word,

I love this. It's, in a word, beautiful.

The Brit | Tue, 09/29/2009

wow

Wow, thanks everyone! *blushes*

Hannah W. | Wed, 09/30/2009

Stunning! Positively

Stunning! Positively stunning!

Erin | Wed, 09/30/2009

"You were not meant to fit into a shallow box built by someone else." -J. Raymond

...

I got chills - and that's a big compliment. Lovely job.

~LoriAnn (to lazy to sign in)

Anonymous | Wed, 09/30/2009

Beautiful, as always.  It's

Beautiful, as always.  It's really mysterious but at the same time light-hearted....This was my favorite line:

Star-strewn, it glitters,
blackened, and bright

 

More like a description, actually...but anyways, it was cool! :)

Clare Marie | Thu, 10/01/2009

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve." -Bilbo Baggins [The Lord of the Rings]

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