The Ultimate Decision, Part 1

Fiction By Jackie West // 3/1/2010

   Dominica awoke to crashes in the house that she shared with her parents and brother. Leaping out of bed, she grabbed the dagger that was on her bedside table and dove into her closet to hide.

  When the crashes stopped, she left her hiding place and crept downstairs. She peeked into her parents' room.


  She then checked her brother's room.


  Dominica ran to the living room and looked out the front window. She made out  shapes in the darkness, hurrying away from her house. She figured that her brother and parents had been kidnapped.

  "But who?" she said. "And why?"

  Why had she not been taken?



 I made a few mistakes, my fault, blame me.Discovered them after my document was saved!

Jackie West | Mon, 03/01/2010

Well i thought it was really

Well i thought it was really good...very intense! I can't wait to read the rest of the story!

Clare | Mon, 03/01/2010


  I thought that it would be a really good story too...I'll post more soon, definitely!! :)

Jackie West | Tue, 03/02/2010

Hmmmm... :) Interesting.

Hmmmm... :) Interesting. Welcome, Eirian =D Write more, please!

Laura Elizabeth | Wed, 03/03/2010

The best stories are those that are focused, unassuming, and self-confident enough to trust the reader to figure things out. --


    I like it too...thanks for the encouragement. I'll definitely post more when I can!!! :) :) =D

Jackie West | Thu, 03/04/2010

You're a good writer!

Thanks for sharing Eirian!!  You write well!  This sounds like it is going to be a pretty intense story.  It reminds me of a young girl who was kidnapped from her bedroom while her family slept.  I can picture the scene you have created.  I bet Dominica's heart was beating pretty fast!  It also reminds me of a modern "Nancy Drew" story that probably hasn't been written yet!  LOL!!   I can't help but wonder where this story is going.  You got my attention!!  You grabbed the reader from the beginning.  Good luck with your story.  Now I'm onto read the first chapter!  ~ Melissa

Anonymous | Wed, 03/10/2010


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