Update: The Glory of Grace - sad musings

An Essay By Jenny // 8/29/2007

I found an old video I made over a year ago with this song as the background music! So now I can share how it sounds with the music. :)
This video is a sad one for me - it was made when I was revelling in being the mother of four children (I always wanted a houseful). Unfortunately, after living in our home for a year, and just before the adoption finalized, the state decided to return the two little ones to their birthmother (despite the fact that the baby girl had no idea who she was). It's been nine months since they left, and it's still very hard -- the entire family misses them. It's been especially hard on our sons since in their minds they lost two little siblings - with no option of ever knowing where they are or how they're doing. In fact they probably don't even remember us anymore. It's so very sad... I am so thankful that I have my two boys, I can't imagine how awful it would be to lose the little ones i loved if I had no children of my own. I don't know how families do it when they have no other children in their homes and the children they are in the process of adopting are returned to their birthparents. I understand that the courts don't like to remove children from their parents, but when they are babies and haven't seen them in over a year, you'd think it would be less traumatic to let them stay with the family they know and love... In situations like that it is hard to remember that God is in control, but it is the only comfort available as well. It is God's plan, and I might never understand it, but I can rest in the fact that He does -- and He's big enough to watch over those babies that were mine for so long, even while I can't...

Anyway, I posted the video to my blog so you can click on Neuropoetry if you want to hear what it souds like - the video isn't the best, but the words are still there...


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