Halfway Happy~Scents You've Been Gone (32)

A Poem By Kassady // 10/19/2014

Halfway Happy
My eyes soak in, 
The sight of your face, 
An image of you halfway happy, 
Smiling. 
My lips turn up into a smile, 
Heart strings tugging, 
Something seems to be missing, 
Somewhere something in my chest, 
Somewhat empty. 
Am I now just feeling the pain? 
Is this how a break up is supposed to feel,
Or am I just making it all up? 
How can I know, 
When I've led myself to feel, 
To believe, 
In one thing when really I was hiding, 
My true feelings.
Do I really miss you, 
Or do I miss being in a relationship? 
Partly I feel I do miss you, 
As a person I cared for, 
But honestly the latter rings true; 
But man, I feel heartless,
Just for admitting to that.

Boston Cream Donut
Expertly navigating my mouth, 
Handling the delicacy in my hand with care, 
Sinking with weight in the middle, 
Soft under my fingers.
I bite, 
Sweetness soaking my taste buds in delight, 
Chocolate and cream and dough, 
Everything sends me into a sugary dream. 
Yes it's true, 
I'm in love, 
All the way and never looking back, 
I couldn't live without you, 
You make me happy, 
Food, my darling, I love you so. 

Daydreaming #1000,0000
Night time inquiries, 
Into the sanity of my mind, 
Questions which amuse me, 
Keep me company, 
Keep me on my toes. 
Daydreams before dreams, 
Before drifting off to sleep, 
The daydreams drift sometimes, 
Into dangerous territory, 
Making me ask again, 
Into the sanity of my mind. 
Grand stories, 
Adventures in time, 
Romance divinely expressed, 
Worldly places, 
Traveling the globe, 
Magic and love follow closely behind, 
The trailing hem of my robes, 
Soft and velvet, 
Jewels crowning my head, 
Eyes sparkling like stars, 
And feet moving with a grace only in fantasies. 
Friendly strangers smile temptingly, 
Beckoning me further into the dream, 
Rich with color, 
My imagination wanders freely, 
Savagely cutting away logic, 
Throwing it behind my shoulder, 
Never looking back. 
Eyelids flutter still closed, 
Darkness paints the backdrop golden, 
With castles and rivers, 
Restaurants in Venice, 
And islands with beauty unreserved.

Gag Reflex
I always enjoyed thinking of our kiss, 
Daydreaming of the softness of your lips, 
How can one character on the screen, 
Change my feelings from delight to disgust, 
How can a wistful longing turn into suppressed gagging? 
You were a good kisser, 
I remember, I think?
But the look on the actor, 
(The character I loath and detest) 
Was so alike to your own once, 
So very close to your look then, 
It flipped my stomach, 
Gave me chills, 
My gag reflex threatening to take over. 
I'm sure it'll wear off, 
I'll remember how special ours actually was, 
But till them I'm revolted, 
No doubt I want to scrub my mind, 
And just start over again. 

Yeah I Hate
Yeah I hate having guy friends, 
Having a wild imagination, 
Not being able to control my mind, 
Even when I try. 
Yeah I hate it when I obsess, 
When a thought pops up, 
Making me mentally punish myself, 
Telling myself "it's idiotic to think that way," 
The equivalent of sending my imagination into the corner. 
Yeah I hate the ease of technology, 
My abilities to keep up conversations, 
With the opposite gender without having to smile constantly. 
Monitoring my actions is difficult, 
Monitoring theirs just as hard, 
Both an addictive habit, 
Like reloading the Facebook newsfeed, 
Over and over, 
Over and over, 
Over and over again. 
Yeah I hate my eagerness, 
My quick replies, 
My desperate impatient waiting. 
I hate how I always start, 
Why can't they initiate conversations? 
Yeah I hate having guy friends, 
They're tedious and confusing, 
Always tempting my daydreams, 
Appearing in my real dreams, 
In roles quite awkward when waking. 
I've been wooed by one, 
And kissed by two, 
Or three if you count the one, 
Daydreams or night dreams, 
I can't escape hormones, 
And my teenage desire for romance, 
And oh yeah how I hate it! 

Don't
Don't wanna get up, 
Don't want to be responsible, 
Don't wanna get dressed, 
Or look presentable. 
All I want to do is curl up in a ball, 
Pretend I'm sick, 
Or go into hibernation. 
Wish I could fall back into the same dream, 
Wish I could go over it again, 
Wish it was slower and would never end, 
Because I was in your arms, 
And you lifted me off the ground, 
Looking up at me with a smile again.

 
Scents You've Been Gone
What's that smell? 
It taunts me, 
Tickling my nose, 
And making me go crazy, 
Because it smells like you. 

Comments

I loved Daydreaming #1000,0000!

It seemed so quotable! "Night time inquires / into the sanity of my mind..." "Daydreams before dreams." And "beauty unreserved" just ends it so well :)

Sarah Bethany | Wed, 10/22/2014

Thanks!

Thank you so much Sarah Bethany for reading :) your comment brought a smile to my face!

Kassady | Thu, 10/23/2014

"Here's looking at you, Kid"
---
Write On!

Thanks!

Thank you so much Sarah Bethany for reading :) your comment brought a smile to my face!

Oops didn't mean to post twice!

Kassady | Thu, 10/23/2014

"Here's looking at you, Kid"
---
Write On!

Sorry, I thought I had

Sorry, I thought I had commented on this! Sigh...I don't know what I'm doing anymore!
Anyway, I loved the imagery in Daydreaming #1000,0000. Boston Cream Donut was hilarious, especially that last line (don't worry, I feel the same way lol). I really liked Halfway Happy, but didn't like the second to last line:
"But Man!!! I feel like a heartless human being..." I felt like the three exclamation points kind of interrupted the flow of the line, and then "heartless human being" just came across sounding sort of awkward to me. I know what you were trying to convey, so I think it's important that you have it in there in some form, just re-worded so it sounds more natural...maybe something more muted like, "but man, I feel so heartless and cold/just for admitting to that". Not those exact words of course, because I don't even like that very much, but you get the idea :) great job on this set!

Erin | Sat, 10/25/2014

"You were not meant to fit into a shallow box built by someone else." -J. Raymond

Thank you Erin!

Thanks so much! Yeah I keep falling back into that awful habit of using too many exclamation points, it's such a bad habit that's so hard to break. Not sure how to reword that, but I agree... I'll play around with it... Thanks :)

Kassady | Mon, 10/27/2014

"Here's looking at you, Kid"
---
Write On!

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